News - April 3, 2025

Yo, choom. Todays data streams were lit with some serious gonk moves from the top brass.

First up, Trump's playing hardball with China, dangling tariff relief if they greenlight the TikTok deal. Gonk's set a 10% tariff across the board, but China's feeling the heat with a hefty 54% on their goods, likely leading to higher prices across the board in the US. Clock's ticking with an April 5 deadline for TikTok to switch hands or get flatlined in the U.S. Meanwhile, the EU's not vibing with Orange Gonk's tariff game, calling it old-school protectionism. France's Macron is even hinting at putting the brakes on U.S. investments until the dust settles. The EU's gearing up their own counterattacks, targeting U.S. goods.

On the corp front, Elon's making waves by publicly stepping back from his Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) gonkery. But don't be fooled; JD Vance says Musk will still be in the mix as a "friend and adviser." This move comes amidst a storm of controversies, from Tesla boycotts and recalls to SpaceX misfires. Remember, the White House previously claimed Musk "has no actual or formal authority" in DOGE, but we all know he's been pulling strings behind the scenes. So, there's a decent chance Elon's still unofficially running some ops.

In other news, it's time to ditch those bloated corp OSes. Switching your rigs to Linux and crafting your own Raspberry Pi cyberdecks isn't just for the elite netrunners anymore. It's about taking control, customizing your digital experience, and staying off the radar of the corpos.

Here at Evil KBGY9 News, we're all about bringing you the raw, unfiltered truth from the underbelly of the sprawl. But we can't do it without your help. We're always on the lookout for fresh intel and, of course, eddies to keep the lights on. If you've got leads or can spare some scratch, hit us up. Stay sharp, stay connected, and keep running the net.